Elephant of the Room

One of my favorite custom rings was built a few years ago for a mom who wanted a non-traditional birthstone ring to represent her three kids. I had long admired this person from a distance and working with her up close was both exciting and intimidating. 

As she held a large stone against her hand contemplating its part in her ring, she looked at me and said, “I guess my question is, is it big enough?” and in the inspirational words of the epic film stepbrothers I thought, “did we just become best friends?!” We did not, but I do admire her and we built an amazingly large ring that she wears regularly. 

I often find myself shrinking back when I make various things. I know that’s shocking because I do make some darn big pieces. I shrink designs back for fear of being too much or not enough, standing out, being too loud, not being what people are looking for…the list goes on…

While working on this collection of rings I realized this list of concerns for large scale jewelry probably also leaks over to life. How often are we faced with anxiety over things we perceive as being “too big?” The elephant in the room. The insurmountable project ahead. Our own personality…I suspect this list too could go on and on…

But what if big things are part of the calling on our lives. To be big people, to do big things, to have big conversations? What if we quit trying to hide the elephants and instead embraced them? 

I think a lot of us have an inner elephant. Something we keep trying to hide away or not address because it just feels like it’s too big or too much for ourselves or for those around us. We metaphorically use elephants in these categories that make us feel separated or alone or not enough. But that’s really a poor representation of elephants! 

This summer I was at the zoo and a sweet zookeep shared all her insight on the elephant troop she was caring for. We were watching as a small elephant was cared for by a larger one assuming it was her baby, but it wasn’t! The zookeep took the time to explain how community centric an elephant herd is, caring for one another, bearing each other’s burdens, sticking together through big things. 

Maybe we need to be more like elephants, seeking to bring out the hard and big things and build community around them and maybe even in spite of them. Big things and big conversations are hard and feel insurmountable, but maybe that’s because we aren’t supposed to do them alone. 

This series, “Elephant of the Room” features natural gemstones set in brass with a hand

engraved elephant insignia on the back. Customizable to be rings or pendants, intended to encourage the wearers to be the big ones. Do the big things. Carry the heavy in community. Don’t hide the elephant in the room. Be her. Shop here.

Xo, 

Jilli